Trust

“Some trust in chariots and some in horses, but we trust in the name of the Lord our God.”  Psalm 20:7 NIV

In the time when this verse was written, chariots and horses were the strength of the military.  Soldiers put their trust in the abilities of their horses and the construction of their chariots to carry them through battle and back out of it again.  The symbol of a soldier in his chariot was a symbol of strength and power.

I don’t have a chariot or a horse…but I know what it means to put my trust in THINGS.  I don’t mean a basic level of trust, as in trusting this chair will hold me without breaking.  I mean trusting someone (or something) with my well-being.  With my life.  In my heart of hearts, I want to trust God.  I say that I trust Him and I pray that I trust Him, but sometimes the evidence proves that I have put my confidence elsewhere.  What evidence?  When I look into my pantry and see plenty of cans and boxes and bags of food, I feel secure.  But on a day when I look in the pantry and see only a few undesirable items left on the shelves….and then realize it will be a LONG time until we get a paycheck from a client, I feel the fear sneak in.  Without meaning to, I can rest my sense of security on how full my pantry is.

Another body of evidence:  My husband has been a freelance photographer for most of our married life, so we haven’t been tenured members of the “regular” paycheck club.  Things have leveled off as God has blessed him and he has become more established in his career.  But there have been times—months even—when we didn’t get paid.  Those times reveal to me how much I actually rely on my husband’s job and money in our bank account to make me feel okay.

In the meager times when I don’t have much in my hands, I am so much more aware of how I need God.  I need Him in my life just so I can breathe.  I need Him desperately as my Savior.  I need Him to infiltrate every avenue of my life, inward and outward.  I believe this journey I am on is by His design, simply from the sweetness of His heart.  It is on this journey that I can see how He makes me lie down in green pastures and leads me beside still waters.  I realize that in this process of needing Him and being made to lie down and receive, He restores my soul.

My soul wants to trust in things that are physical and tangible, but I must realign it.  I must constantly refocus my soul-sights on God, who is the Creator and Sustainer.  He alone can provide for all my needs.  No job is secure, no amount of money is certain, and some days, we run low on groceries.  But God never fails. He is TRUSTworthy.  Sometimes, the easiest way to see His faithfulness is to come to the end of your own provisions.

Are you there?  Do you need to realign your soul to come under the covering of the Sustainer? 

Lord, You are the Source and the Sustainer.  I thank You for seeing me and knowing my situation very intimately.  I invite You to come fill up my emptiness with Your goodness.  I am giving You all my nothingness and asking You to pour out Your provision and blessings in my life.  Cover me, Lord.  Thank You for Your word that goes before me and for Your protection all around me!  I proclaim to my future that You are Lord and You will sustain me! I WILL trust in Your name, Lord God!   In Jesus’ name, Amen.